Thursday, August 21, 2008

Second Chance

I got this big fat letter in the mail today ...In big letters it says "HERE'S THAT SECOND CHANCE YOU HOPED FOR LooseCanon"...
I had to stop for a moment and check the return side of it....Make sure it wasn't from God or somebody important.....
It was from Mutual of Omaha....
That's an insurance provider right?.....I've never done business with them,...ever...
So it was with some amazement I stood there by my rickety mail box on this hot august afternoon with thunder heads towering up in the east, causing a slight back draft prevailing from my west...I'd been working under the house making a basement storage area ..Just me and my constant companion Violet...My one female cat...In fact...
....That's her kicking' back while I write this thing still fresh in my mind...
I came up from under the house for some air, and the breeze by the mail box felt fine as it dried up the sweat on my chrome dome and shoulders...It's one of those freebies in life I try to make note of when ever it occurs...
So, Mutual of Omaha claims to have the second chance I've been hoping for....Got to love modern technology...How those guys could manage not only to 'know' what the second chance I've been hoping for was,... but to fit it into an envelope small enough to slip inside my mail box....I am impressed...
I figure I am going to be even more impressed when I finally open the envelope up...Reminds me Johnny Carson doing Carnac the Magnificent....
Like I said I've never had any dealings with the company...
Yea, I know the obvious..They are about insurance...Security....Including life insurance...
The kind of insurance that some how appeals to our fear of death..
Insuring a kind of concrete knowledge that for at least while the benefactors are 'in the money', you are still ,'in the show',...beyond the grave...
....A positive haunting.....
It temporarily beats back the finality of death.......You know, the thing that scares the shit out of us and makes us 'governable'.....
Life of the party LooseCanon,.....
Only thing I know about Mutual of Omaha is they sponsor that 'Wild Kingdom' show on television....It originated in 1963 and the host was Marlin Perkins..
The show was great.....Lots of education about how the other beings on the planet survive and find fulfillment...
It seems to me strange logic that a insurance company would sponsor documentary style television promoting nature's natural selection process..If anything, a fundamental denominator of all creatures surviving the wild is the absolute knowledge life holds no security....
When an insurance company pays out a claim it's only the monetary portion of the loss that's covered..For example, when a subscriber loses their home to fire or flood the best case scenario would be the insurance funds cover complete rebuilding of the structure..
Insurance programs have no means to cover the emotional trauma such a disaster entails...
I was reading recently an article entitled, 'Our Lives, Controlled From Some Guy’s Couch' http://www.nytimes.com/2007/08/14/science/14tier.html
that suggests we may in fact be living in someone else's 'Matrix'....This hypothesis is based on the current standard of virtual technology weighting it against the short time it has taken virtual technology to arrive at it's current state...
I figure it's just a matter of time before we see insurance companies advertising a policy that guarantees total protection from the events we now insure ourselves against...Initially the policy will be expensive, just to pay for all that software..
However in time, I expect it will become mandatory 'State law' for all citizens to carry such a policy...After all, the burden tax payers are shelling out to support 'social programs' would be eliminated in a flash if nothing 'bad' ever happened..
So, what you think?...Has the future of insurance already arrived?...
Is it possible the 'second chance' I've been waiting for is in fact the program I described, waiting for me inside this large envelope needing only my simple signature (and credit card number of course) on the dotted line?
I'm getting excited!..Are you getting excited? I am definitely getting excited!
I'm tearing this baby open man!...Oh shit...
I forgot...
I got laid off last week and my credit card is max'd out!
Opening this little slice of heaven is just gonna' get me all depressed...
Well, hell...Story of my life..And to think I missed my second chance by that....much...
It's ok though, cuz I bet you all are going to get one of these envelopes in your mailbox too!..Yeah, I mean come on, it's not like I am special or anything...I bet Mutual of Omaha wants everybody to get in on this deal!
Wow, I got to admit, I feel pretty good knowing there's so many folks out there going to get the 'second chance they have been hoping for'....